I'm sort of embarrassed to be coming here, again, to say...um, fail. All of this month's goals went out the window. Though we did do maintenance from other months, so I guess that is good.
I didn't intend to do so, but I spent this month reading a lot in an attempt to better understand my brain and my kids' brains. My husband would be like, you are reading another one (I think, ahem, seven books? can you say, still nursing? can't let go?)? I've learned so much about the hows and whys of ADD life, including adjusted schedules and routines to fit our own circumstance. For example, I've learned how important routines are (ha, funny), how important exercise is, and how important it is to structure one's environment to give reminders (now I know why I have become a religious user of the timer in the kitchen! could not survive without it, even if I have to put something in for two more minutes I always set it for that or else I forget and burn something!), how important it is to tack one task on to another, how important socialization is, how important it is to unlock the hidden potential and talents within ADD, and how (so obvious to me now!) important it is to be careful not to overdo it (poor concept of time and the like). I have gained a whole bunch of insight into myself and how I function, and have started accepting that I will just plain never be good at some things. I've already adjusted some other tasks and expectations-- all it took was a little encouragement to see just how miserable I was at "x" . And hyperfocus? I'm thinking that I need to structure my day to take advantage of hyperfocus, and accept how difficult it is for me to switch gears. So if I can give myself bigger chunks of time to do something, rather than a bunch of little ones that alternate (here is one example: I have read many times that someone with our family size should do laundry every day, but this just does not work for me. I think I'd rather have a mountain twice a week, than a string of clean/dirty laundry that never ends!)
I will do a post about the books I read soon, I don't know why I never read a book on the subject sooner! I've still had my ups and downs as I've alternated between a sense of relief (I finally know why I struggle with some things!), validation (there are many other people out there who have been through it to!), and, lets just admit it, sadness, as I mourn for what I've lost and mourn a bit for my kids who will have some struggles to face up to yet. Finally, peace, as I have realized that ADD presents a whole new range of opportunities and possibilities, just waiting to be unlocked, as I finally accept the things I can't do alone, as well as accepting the gifts that come with it too. Here is to a fresh start!
We have been enjoying the outdoors this week! It has been a really beautiful, cool, leave-your-windows-open-at-night-and-snuggle-up-under-the-covers (and rush around shutting them when the rain rolls in!) kind of week. The little ones and I have had some adventures. I love that they are still little and with me during the day. And I am so excited for school to get out! To have everyone all to myself, less schedules, and some warm weather to enjoy. Have a marvelous weekend, dear ones!
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