24th Weekend

Celebrated the 24th of July weekend in Wyoming this year with a parade and a trip to the mountains (Jul 24th a holiday in some parts of the West, see here...).

We got poured on while in the mountains, but it was fine!  We got to bond in our warm cars, and at one point, all my kiddos were in a car with someone else, so I got to stretch out in the backseat and enjoy a delicious first chapter of Moby Dick while the rain pattered on the roof.  Later we were able to get out and enjoy the scenery after the rain stopped.

The men making yummy lunch.

(This was breakfast-- sort of an American version of Spanish tortilla....more tomorrow about this month's resolutions)

Do you celebrate the 24th of July in your part of the country or the world? 

Some Things I Want to Remember

Three year old calls sunscreen "sunscream."

My six year old calls rodeos "radios."  ("Mom, lets go to the radio.")

She used to call the elevator the "elligator."

Baby is cutest little parrot right now-- any time we ask the kids a question, my baby raises his hand and says "me!"   If the kids say "I do!"  So does he.  The other day in the car we were listening to Treasure Island and the kids started singing "yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!" and baby would say "RUMMMM!"  Ha ha, especially since we're teetotalers around here.

Nine year old's room emitting a strange glow at night-- that is when I know she is reading by wandlight.  :)

Ten made up his own joke-- "did you know the scriptures command us not to grow up?  They say 'thou shalt not commit adultery.'" (he did't even know what that was)  He found a funny site that listed actual bloopers written on church programs (not Mormon).  We laughed our guts out.  He is so fun to laugh with. Our favorites:

"This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar."

"The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'"

"Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person(s) you want remembered."

"Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands."

"At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is @#!*% ?" Come early and listen to our choir practice."
See here (scroll halfway down page to "Church Bulletin Bloopers") and here for a good laugh.


Busy day today...I have some fun pictures of the weekend, can't wait to post them!  Also, excited for a new month's resolutions.  Found anything lately that makes you laugh?  We'd love to hear!

About This Project & This Month's Recap

My kids surprised me yesterday.  I had to harness my inner drill sergeant at the very first (SO hard for me, I do not have a drill sergeant personality), but after a bit these kids were working together and actually enjoying it.  See the third picture?  Ten year-old was singing and whistling "Whistle While You Work," (see his lips?).   As I look back on this month, we had our tragedies and triumphs and maniacal laughs.  See below for a recap.

Just in case you're new here, here is a quick recap of my project so far.  I'm working on making the most of the next five years with my kids to give them the best next 50 and forever (just like the time value of money).  :)  I'm using this blog to track my progress and memorize those beautiful little moments each day as they pass. 

Another main purpose of this blog is to keep my perspective in focus-- remembering that I will some day be able to travel, have a hobby, use the bathroom alone, and have a clean house, but I can't come back and snuggle a chubby baby, read a story, or wipe little tears.  I have one shot at giving them a good life, and this is it.  My most viewed post is a poem about perspective-- here.  Or this one, just featured on BlogHer (to my total surprise!  I almost deleted it!).

Included in my project are collateral areas that affect my parenting, such as my relationship with my spouse and Heavenly Father, including keeping myself replenished so I have enough to give.  As inspired by Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project, each month's resolutions carry over to the next month.

Each month, I hit a wall roughly a week into a new resolution.  It was a good experience to learn to lean on God more and ask for His help in overcoming my weaknesses and change my heart.   One of the other overarching things I've learned through each month is that if I focus on communicating love, the kids forgive my shortcomings and mistakes (there are lots, trust me). 

(If you scroll over to the top right, a gray box will appear. There is one marked "labels," that will lead you to different post topics.)

Month 1:

*  Worked on quality time with kids each day, twice a month dates with husband, exercise each morning, to name a few. See recap of month one here. 

Month 2:

*  Worked on speaking positively to and about my kids.  Still noticing how organization (or lack thereof!  mostly that!), cleanliness around the house, and a good night's rest aid or abet this goal.  :)   Recap, see here.

Month 3 (see goals here):

*  Took the first week and worked on organization-- made a set of goals and rules.  This was great at helping me see the big picture.  Updated my kid's job charts for the summer. 

*  For spouse-- worked on a budget.  Embarrassing, I noticed how much money I spent on eating out.  (it seemed like every other entry was "Little Caesar's!"-- guaranteed the other nights we were eating cereal for dinner)  Note a bit of foreshadowing here as I prepare for next month.  :)  I learned that more important than how much a couple makes is the different partner's attitudes toward money.  Found this website through Parent's Magazine, its called Find Your Money Mind ( here ).  It helps couples find out how they view money and facilitates communication with spouse/partner.  Very interesting!

*  For myself and the kids, I focused this month on Hard Work.  After nearly 12 years of being pregnant or nursing most the time, I was in a major energy rut.  Just the simple "act the way you want to feel," from The Happiness Project, helped a lot.  Acting energetic helped me feel energetic (not saying I'm great, but improved enough to be pleased about it).  Gretchen Rubin did a great write-up about improving energy levels on her blog yesterday-- see here.

*  I wanted to help my kids learn to really value work, and I gave a lesson on work one night, seemed like it really sunk in (see here); while it really helped me to remember the value of work it made no external life difference that I can see in my kids.  :) 

*  I read The Parenting Breakthrough by Merrilee Boyack.  This gave some inspiration and encouragement and guidance in the realm of teaching kids how to work.  I will have to pick this element up again in a few months.  I was worried my kids would complain when I told them about the new jobs and skills they would be learning in the next couple of months, and they totally surprised me by being mildly excited! (just a clue, I found the above mentioned book on my nine year old's bookcase by her bed...just a little light reading to make her sleepy)  Also, I stepped back and let them do more for themselves and they loved it! (a big "duh!" for me, I guess)

*  Made a schedule for myself-- biggest joke of all time!  I didn't even do it once!  Did I forget that this is summer?  And I have a baby?  I will try again in a few months.

*  We limited TV time to one hour at a specific time of day for the summer, if their chores aren't done they get an hour of quiet time in their rooms while the other kids watch.

They totally surprised me on this one!  I thought they'd cry and make a big fuss every day about the TV and they act like they've hardly even noticed!  I was hoping my new TV rule would help them work harder, faster in the morning (something my husband wants them to learn).  It only did about half the time.  Many other days they just played and played all morning with no concern over jobs.  Only one day were there some major tears over this, when I made them go to their rooms for quiet time when jobs weren't done.  (I also had to be a bit flexible on this-- went for a hike early so it wouldn't be too hot, so I extended time for them to do jobs when we got home)

It didn't help them learn how to work harder, faster, like I'd envisioned, but at least they were playing and not watching TV!  And this, coupled with some really fun outings this month...I think they are closer to each other than they've been in a while.  Just this morning, for example, they played "nation," by arranging tiny rocks and airsoft pellets into elaborate formations on the floor.

*  My two jars-- mystery motivators and extra jobs jar....well, these produced just okay results.

You're sick of me by now.  I'm sick of myself, too. 

I'm excited for next month!  We've definitely had our ups and downs but things are more up than down.  And I feel so much more fulfilled than I did before my project, and my kids seem happier.  There is an energy booster right there.

What are you doing this weekend?  Do you have any tips that have helped you teach your kids the value of work?  Or organization tips?

Hike

We hiked on a local trail in the morning; the kids liked it so much we went home and packed up and did the hike we had planned for this day.  The mountains were cool and green and beautiful.   We were passed by friendly mountain bikers who smelled of fresh dirt and sweat, arms glistening in the sun.  Littlest girl looking for bugs and air soft pellets and fool's gold.  :)  Even the baby wanted to hold my hand with this tiny one, walking haltingly over roots and jutting gray rocks.  We stopped and sat in the brown dirt and ate sticky granola bars and drank water from an old gray plastic water bottle.

At the end, we played in a trickling stream that was low from the dry season.  Six year-old said "thank you for bringing us here!"

Had In-N-Out in our wet clothes and squishy shoes and inhaled the conversation.

That night, the little girls recounted all the day's adventures to their dad while he, bent over, planted ground cover between bare flagstone rocks.  As I pulled the door closed, I heard a breathless "it was like a mini bacation!"  (pronounced buh-cation)

It felt so good to be together and be outside and doing something active (note to self!).  We really could do better about doing things like this!   It's too easy to get stuck in a rut sitting around inside.

Could be dreaming, but the kids have hardly mentioned the TV this week.  And I think we're closer too. 

Rainy Days and Mondays

Grandma came over.  For a few hours before she arrived, Ava would shout out the front door-- "Grandma, where are you?" in a really loud manly (little girly-manly) voice.

We had plans to go somewhere fun-- maybe here or have a picnic and hike in the mountains.  Instead, the skies decided to gather ominous black clouds, which blew our way and started the biggest downpour we've seen in a long time.  So we had to change our plans.  But we had a wonderful time-- maybe even better that we would have had   (and my mom helped me fold my laundry!  and get a few of those things done I haven't been able to get to since Emerson wants to be held a lot).

We made cupcakes for some neighbors who seemed like they needed a little boost (decided this is a huge well refiller for me...see here), had dinner, played in the rain (a little), and enjoyed the heck out of those little leftover puddles after the black raincloud had gone.  Puddle splashing was so refreshing, and it was so fun to see the kids excitement with the rain and the puddles.   And I always enjoy my mom.

LOVE summer rains. :)

Grandma entertains and cuddles Emerson while I get some dinner made!  Wahoo! SO cute.

Sunday's Warrior

My son wanted to go play sword fight in the backyard on Sunday (I promise we don't promote violence...the son who proposed this won't even kill a bug).  When I went out, this is what I found (I guess she overheard our conversation?):

This little one was surprisingly aggressive!  She made me laugh so hard! 

We played this swordfighting game the other day and had a good laugh.  The rules were-- nothing above the chest, and if you got "nicked" somewhere, say, your arm, you could not longer use that appendage.  So we had a great time hopping on one leg using our left hand at times.  :)

 
(had our very worst "finger" accident ever (earlier in the day)!  I felt so badly that I wasn't able to stop it!  I thought his finger was crushed.  He seems to be okay.

Disclaimer #'s 2 and 3

This blog is dedicated to helping me be a better parent, to make the most of these years with my little ones, and to give them the best possible start in life.   Read disclaimer number one here, about how there is no one right way to parent....this is just what works for me.  We moms are all in this together, and it helps us help each other if we don't judge each other because something that works for someone else doesn't work for us, and vice versa.

Disclaimer No. 2 - no guilt.  In sharing our happy times and triumphs, my intention is never to create guilt for anyone (I've been on the other side of that coin!  Trust me!).  Just know that there are plenty of things we don't do well, and plenty of bad days, but I've learned that focusing on the positive helps me stay positive (I could send you a picture of our weeds or disheveled closets and you would feel much better!).  If you feel guilt (please don't! we women do these things and we shouldn't!), remember this quote I heard the other day about guilt not being meant for scorn, but to beckon (heard it from speaker John Bytheway in his talk The Tour de Family, sorry I don't have exact quote).  If it beckons you to higher ground, great.  If it's not productive, ditch it!  It's not worth it.  (especially if it's in the past)

Disclaimer 3 - religion.  You've probably figured out by now that I'm a Mormon.  No, I do not have horns.  Number of mothers: one.  (I have been asked both of these questions by sincere, legitimate people in case you think it's a joke. :)  It is kind of funny.  See thoughtful Washington Post article here).  I will try to keep this mostly personal, but once in a while I will share something about my relationship with God or something from a Mormon source (we prefer to be referred to as LDS, not Mormons, but it's ok).  Don't worry.  I'm not targeting anyone, just sharing what helps me.  If I didn't, this would be an incomplete picture of my journey, since those things are a huge part of who I am and why I do what I do.  If you would like to learn more about Mormonism, please visit www.Mormon.org.  You are also welcome to email me with any questions or see the "my faith" button on my sidebar.